all right now this is appropriate we're gonna do a song that I wrote with a guy who was actually born in this town I know you all fucking know the guy named let me kill myself anyway this is a song that he and I wrote but uh Todd dammit Kearns is gonna fucking do the vocal chores on this one isn't he pretty all right this is called dr. alibi I went to see the doctor, he said you're pretty sick you got some real bad habits, you better stop right quick dead doctor, that's real bad news, don't know what I'm gonna do doctor, nothing's wrong with me, doctor, doctor, can't you see doctor, I ain't gonna die, just might be an alibi I went to see a shaman, he said you'll be alright just keep doing what you love, every fucking night said that's what I need to hear, took away my childish fears doctor, you're a stand-up guy, doctor, doctor, my oh my doctor, you're the one for me, that's the mojo that I need don't you know I feel alright, doing what I do I ain't gonna tell the lie, not till I turn blue all we got is one short life, that's what people say I ain't gonna waste a second, doing what you say I won't be the one you like, I won't be the boy next door I won't be the chosen one, that's not what I'm here for I don't like the way you are, I despise what you hold dear don't you try to make me change, I'll haunt you for a thousand years doctor, don't you talk that way, doctor, don't you miss my day doctor, stay away from me, this is what I'd rather be doctor, doctor, doctor death, doctor, doctor out of breath doctor, I ain't gonna die, just write me an alibi